Superbowl Sunday Saga

Here's one of the last pictures we have of Joshua with all his baby teeth, taken Friday night after his bath.

Superbowl Sunday started out pretty normal, going to church as a family. This year, we stayed home to watch the game together - Shawn likes the football and I enjoy seeing what the ads are like. Shawn ordered sandwiches from a local pizza shop we enjoy, and the boys watched some of the game with us. We put the kiddos to bed at half time (hearing the lies from the Black-Eyed Peas that "Tonight's Gonna Be a Good Night"). Joshua was SO tired that night. Caleb cried out maybe ten minutes after we were done snuggling them that he needed changed, and Joshua bawled that his little brother had woken him. Once again, I tucked the Bean in, pulling his quilt up on him and giving him a kiss on his forehead. He went right back to sleep.

Just after the Packers won on our TV (which we had delayed since we watched the half time show after putting the kids to bed and even paused it to change Caleb and tuck the boys back in bed), we heard a terrible crash/thud. I would guess it was just after 11 pm, or 3 hours after we put them to bed. We ran upstairs to find Joshua in a pool of blood. Shawn got there first and when I arrived, the lights were on and Shawn's shirt was soaked in red. I screamed and told Shawn to get his shoes on, we were going to the ER. 

Somehow Joshua had fallen out of bed, and in the process, we assume that he smashed his face on the steel rail that runs along the sides, holding the headboard to the foot-board.

Here's Joshua in his bed with his dinosaur train PJs, which were covered in blood after that dreadful night.

 

I called the pediatrician as we got our shoes on, and talked to the doctor immediately since it was an emergency. She confirmed that the ER was the place to go, noting that if any teeth had fallen out, we should take them along in milk. Joshua began vomiting up some of the blood he had swallowed. We had blood everywhere in our bathroom, and I got an old towel for him to carry out to the minivan. We were all terrified. I insisted on going along because I was so worried, so I grabbed the sleeping Caleb Luke, threw his jacket and shoes on him, grabbed my purse with our insurance cards and we RAN out the door to the car.


Shawn dropped Joshua & I off at the Emergency Room door while he parked the car. We were registered almost right away, and she couldn't take his blood pressure but said that was okay. The nurse also told us that he couldn't digest human blood so whatever was going down would indeed come right back up. I felt SO bad for him. He kept telling us there was a big circle in his mouth. The circle was one of his two front upper teeth that had been smashed backward into his mouth but was still hanging there. His bottom row of teeth had gone through his bottom lip/chin, so there was blood everywhere. He was bawling, and we felt So bad for him.

Eventually we were called back to a room, where a nurse came in and asked him how he was doing. She also gave him a warm blanket, and he was so thankful for it. He said how nice the blanket was. I simply can't get over how sweet my Bean is, even in times of distress. The doctor didn't come in for a LONG, LONG time. Joshua kept asking where the teacher was (he meant female doctor) and said he didn't want a boy. But, unfortunately, it was a boy doctor. He took a look and told us that he would give him something for pain, then he was going to glue up his chin. He also informed us that he had many other patients and would be back in a bit. It was a loooong bit.

A different nurse came in to give him the pain medication and he vomited everywhere when she tried to give it to him. I don't think he got a drop of it. The doctor said not to try again. Eventually, he came back in and said he was not only going to glue up the chin but also try to pull the dangling tooth because he was afraid it would come out and Josh would swallow it. He asked if that was okay with us, and I looked at Shawn and we both looked unsure. We said to do what the doctor thought best because Joshua did indeed want the circle to be gone.

Without any pain medication, the doctor put glue over his open chin wound and sterile strips as it just continued to gush blood everywhere. Then he asked us as parents to hold down the Bean while he tried to extract the tooth. Joshua SCREAMED and the tooth didn't budge. The doctor said that it was in there good enough that it was not going to come out; however, he shouldn't eat anything before seeing the dentist first thing in the morning, noting that no dentist would do anything before they opened their doors. Being pregnant and seeing so much blood, let alone my baby in pain, my head was spinning and I took a little container, fearing that I, too, was going to throw up and possibly even pass out. Thankfully, neither happened. I was SO woozy, and I was SO thankful that Shawn was there, too.

I sang Joshua a couple songs that soothed him, and the nurse gave him stickers with our discharge paperwork. We took him home, and to his dismay the "circle" was still there. We got home just before 3 am and of course, I couldn't sleep a wink even though all the boys in the house did eventually pass out. I called the pediatric dentist at 6:30 am, just in case he would be able to see us before his day started officially. I have to say Dr. Aaron Miller is SO nice and didn't yell at me for waking him up or anything. He asked about the Bean's medical history and upon hearing Joshua had one and a half lungs, asthma and a long list of previous medical conditions, he told us that their "star" patients (or ones that only see him or his father) should go directly to an oral surgeon where they have the anesthesia to do whatever is necessary. He gave me two names of offices he recommended in the area. I called both of them, and the answering services told me that they would call me after 8 and 8:30 am, respectively. I was so upset. But, I decided to grab a quick shower and look up our dental insurance, discovering that only one of them took our primary insurance for Joshua and neither took the secondary. At 8:30, I called the second office back (the one who took our insurance) and gave them the details of Joshua's situation. She said that she had an opening at 10 am and to come immediately to fill out paperwork and they'd get him started even sooner if we were ready.

I got Shawn up, dressed both boys, dropped Caleb off at my sister's house, and we drove Joshua over to the oral surgeon's office. When filling out the paperwork, I informed them that he had a secondary insurance in case they would take it, and they gave us an incredibly difficult time about it. I said "skip it then," but the girl insisted that they couldn't see him without a pre-authorization and skipping it would be insurance fraud. What? If I want to pay, how is that 'fraud?' I was furious but kept calm as I told her that I would pay for it outright if I had to, HE WAS GOING TO BE SEEN NOW!!!!! Eventually she talked to someone with brains, and they took us back. I was more than aggravated, but kept it together. Who keeps a four-year-old in pain waiting because of paperwork? We had one insurance that they accepted, and I was willing to give them any amount of money to make him better. Grrrrr... But, my goal was to be calm and peaceful for my baby.

The first thing they did was take x-rays (and I had to leave the room, being pregnant) and then took us to the room where Joshua sat in this big chair with the booster seat. The oral surgeon came in and only had nine fingers. I thought to myself "do we get him because there was an issue with our insurance?" He was AMAZING, though, and I'm glad we got him. Upon reviewing the x-rays, he informed us that both of Joshua's two front upper teeth were damaged in his fall. One was pushed up into his mouth while the other was shoved down and back inside his mouth. He needed surgery to get them out. They put Joshua to sleep using a mask (we called it a 'funny' treatment since Joshua is used to breathing treatments with masks), and I couldn't be there when they did it since I have a "baby in my belly." Shawn was there until Joshua was out and then came tearfully into the waiting room where I was already crying. He said that Josh fought the treatment and seemed scared. Oh, how our hearts break for our kids!

Within ten minutes, the oral surgeon came to the waiting room and got us, saying they were all finished. He had extracted both teeth and put stitches in Joshua's upper gums. He noted that there are good chances that the permanent teeth weren't affected, but we won't know for sure until they come in. He also told us (on a side note) that we should start saving now for the Orthodontist since Joshua's adult teeth are too many and too large for the size of his mouth. :( :( :( I told him how I had a pallet expander and he said that was exactly what Joshua was going to need and may even want to go to the orthodontist sooner than most kids. He also recommended we see the pediatric dentist to see if he would want to put spacers in where these teeth were or just wait until the other teeth come in in a few years. I scheduled the follow-up appointment when we got home, and Dr. Miller suggested we wait a week until more healing has taken place and Joshua is less traumatized.

The surgeon could tell how upset we were and said he knocked out one of his teeth at the Bean's age and then smiled for us to show us that all his teeth were perfect. He joked that it didn't make him any better looking. But then he showed us his missing finger and said he also did that around Joshua's age. That really struck me, and I'm glad he told us. If he could become a surgeon long after losing his finger at a young age, then I know that Joshua won't be permanently affected by this fall. I was highly impressed by Dr. Eckhart, who also called us later that night to follow up with how our little guy was feeling.

We took a very woozy Joshua home, and they had warned us not to leave his side as his balance would be affected by the anesthesia. He refused to eat or drink until late that evening, the first he'd really had anything in almost 24 hours. He took a couple sips of water from a 'big boy' cup to start. Daddy had went out to get us some caffeine, and I opened a yogurt for Joshua. He was unsure of how to get it in his mouth past his wounded chin and upper teeth, and he burst into tears. So did I. I held his hands and we prayed. I asked God to heal him and give me wisdom as a mama. I was struggling. Then after saying 'AMEN' I suggested to Joshua that he stick out his tongue and dump a little bit of yogurt onto it and then pull it back in. Then, no foreign object would be in his mouth and yet he'd still have a little something to eat. The idea seemed good to the Bean, and he licked the yogurt off the plastic spoon. He seemed at peace with this solution, and I praised God for an immediate answer to prayer.

Joshua was terribly sad that day, and he kept asking for us to take him back to the surgeon to put his teeth back. He didn't want his teeth to be gone. Daddy eventually told him that they had just moved his teeth off to the side to get the circle out of his mouth. That answer seemed better to Joshua, but he wanted them to slide them back over. I tried to explain that all kids lose their teeth eventually, but they are 'baby' teeth and then the 'big kid' or 'adult' teeth grow in and replace them. I showed him a little you tube video on the tooth fairy and tried to get him excited for getting money. He could care less about money. I even showed him a video where the tooth fairy took baby teeth and put them in the sky to shine as stars. He said he wanted his teeth, they were NOT going to be stars like the other kids' teeth. I gave it up. I told him that if he decided he wanted money, we could put the teeth under his pillow (or better yet on his nightstand since he's typically a light sleeper). He said "no fanks."

And here's where I'll stop and say that it was difficult to understand him at first as he was getting used to his new smile. It's getting better but there are still some things that are pronounced with a lisp as he has to be very careful with both the bottom and top of the front of his mouth these days.

I emailed his preschool teacher to inform her of the situation and tell her he wouldn't be at school on Tuesday, the day they go to the gym. She asked me if it would help if she informed the class about Joshua's 'new look' and after talking to Shawn about it, I asked her to make the judgment call. She said that their Bible lesson this week is on showing God's love. So, she told them about Joshua's accident and asked how they could show him love. She emailed me their responses, which included smiles, hugs and gifts. Several of them noted how they have big brothers and sisters with missing teeth and how he must look like an older kid. She said that we shouldn't worry about bringing him back to school - they were prepared!

Joshua, on the other hand, told us he couldn't possibly go to school without his teeth. He was SO apprehensive. Shawn & I worried. And we prayed. And we bawled (well, at least I couldn't stop crying). I took him to school on Wednesday, giving him yogurt for a special snack but letting his teacher know that he didn't have any specific restrictions. He wasn't eating much for us at home, but he was allowed to eat anything he was comfortable with. I picked him up, and she told me that he had fruit snacks and hard pretzels for snack. WHAT!?!!? I guess he didn't want to do anything different than his friends. I was shocked. She also told me that he ripped off the bandage on his chin, noting he didn't like it. YUCK! I was horrified. He seemed to have a good day, though.

We saw the pediatrician that afternoon who told me that everything was healing nicely. If he wouldn't keep anything on his chin, it was better to leave it be than risk him pulling off the glue or scab. She also said that the ER doctor was right to give him antibiotics (which he's been taking) as a preventative measure for infection, and that it's a tough call in that area whether to use glue or stitches, noting that as a child cries and keeps moving his mouth, stitches are very difficult to do in a straight line. I felt better with her explanations. Once again as she showed me the inside of Joshua's mouth and all the discoloration that was "healing," I felt a little woozy. I didn't think I would, but there's something about it being your own child that's rough.

Each day is getting better. Joshua still misses his teeth and asks about them constantly. He also said his chin is ouchy and 'scratchy' (I think he means itchy) and we're having a hard time keeping his fingers away from it (which they said was important). He's doing a little better with eating, but he lost a pound, weighing 35 lbs at the pediatrician's office yesterday with two shirts (one being a sweater) and thick jeans. He's eaten small pieces of strawberries & bananas, yogurt, applesauce, cheerios, school snacks (again - YIKES!) and today for the first time he ate very tiny cut-up pieces of waffle and a sandwich that he requested. I'm thankful that he's starting to eat, and I think it's so sweet how he asks for his things to be cut up "like a baby's."

I also must say how sweet my son is. When we left the ER room, he said that now another sick kid can have his place. He does think about others and says the nicest things. He got a lollipop at school today and gave it to Caleb. I love how he shares and is considerate of others' feelings. I cried over the fact that I would never see him smile with a full set of beautiful baby teeth again. He would never look the same again. But, I was reminded that his true beauty comes from the inside, and hopefully the outside won't be affected forever.

I was heartbroken that he could get so hurt after going to bed. I remembered bringing him home from the hospital, and I thought I'd never sleep again. How do parents ever stop to sleep or take showers? I was worried that something awful would happen to him if my eyes weren't on him every second. Then you ease up after they're okay day after day. You realize that you can't function without sleep, and you pray for your little ones before your eyes close. We still check on our kids throughout the night. Before we go to bed, we make sure that they're in a good position and still covered. When I wake up to go to the bathroom, I peak at them (and so does Shawn).

If we had gone to bed earlier, would it have made a difference? What could we have done better? And we realized that we can't beat ourselves up. Yes, his mattress needed to be moved. It had shifted as they horse around on their beds. Yes, we have now made a new rule that there are to be NO toys in bed, other than one favorite t-bear and his beloved blankey. We still move him over toward the wall now every night when we check on him. But, he hadn't really fallen out of bed before - maybe a couple times when he was tiny, and he always went straight to the carpet. I would have never dreamed that such an accident could even occur. We do our best for our kids. We would never want to see them get hurt. We pray for them, we watch them, and we trust that God has a good plan for their lives. And we have to come to terms with the fact that accidents can happen, even late at night when you think all is safe.

I was trying to think of things to be thankful for... after all, the Bible tells us to give thanks in all circumstances. I was having a hard time giving thanks, if I'm being completely honest. I was upset that God would allow such a horrible thing to happen. But, I knew my attitude was terrible, and as the song goes "a thankful heart is a happy heart." So, I started listing things I'm thankful for as I thought about the entire situation. First, I'm thankful for my kids. They are alive. They are with us. They are smart. They are kind. They are simply amazing. I'm thankful that these are baby teeth and that chins heal. I'm thankful it wasn't something like his eye. I'm thankful that Shawn was home. I'm thankful he's such a good dad and husband. I'm thankful that the ER doctor couldn't extract the tooth because we wouldn't have known that the other one was significantly damaged as well. I'm thankful that Joshua's preschool teacher and classmates are understanding. I'm thankful for how concerned Caleb was for his big brother - it is truly rewarding as a mom to see how much they love each other. Caleb was SO good at the ER while we waited and waited. I'm thankful that there haven't been any other complications like infection. I'm thankful that even though the surgeon's office gave me a hard time about the secondary insurance, the paperwork came through and they will cover anything the primary insurance doesn't. I would pay any price for my kids, but I'm thankful when provision comes in the midst of hard circumstances. I'm thankful that God watches over our kids when we aren't able to or somehow miss something. I heard all sorts of other stories how friends' kids hit their night stands or lost teeth falling on their driveway. It makes you feel like there's nowhere safe, and yet we trust in a loving God. I'm thankful that Joshua is such a great kid, and I know this has to be character-building somehow. While I don't know how this fits into the plan for his life, I'm thankful that there is a greater one than even I have.

Last night, Shawn & I watched the movie "letters to God" where a young child had brain cancer. It was a touching story (and I would highly recommend the movie), and I'm thankful that my kids are generally well.
 I'm thankful for all three of my boys and my truly incredible husband. Some folks never have the opportunity to get married or have kids, and I am blessed beyond measure. I'm thankful for Joshua Douglas Good. And I will continue to praise God in the midst of hard times!